Frustration

Lets just get to it. I'm frustrated. I am frustrated with myself. Im frustrated with myself. I am frustrated with everything I'm not doing.

This time four years ago I was in a time of change. I was saying good bye to many and hello to a few. I had high expectations, expectations I didn't live up to, or meet, whichever you prefer. I thought I was moving on and up, following God's plan for my life moving to Hawaii. Well, that didn't last. I do feel like I learned wht God wanted me to and followed His will but I question whether or not I gave up to soon. DId I come home for me or did I come home because it was right and God was calling me back? Right now I just don't know. I don't know anything...at least that is how I feel.

I don't know how or where to get the job I want let alone any job. I don't know why I am still alone. I don't know why I have all these great ideas and goals for my life and I do nothing with or for them.

I do know I want to make a differnce in the world. Or at least I did but right now I am lost. Where do I go from here? What do I do now? I know the answeer is simple, PRAY, but sadly that has been harder than it sounds these days. I know the power of prayer. If nothing else these past few months have taught me the power and importance of prayer yet I sit here writing to myself rather than talking to God. UGH. Frustration. Disapointment.